I don't care, man
I ain't lying, I don't care, man, I ain't
Just say it wasn't you, man
Nah, man, I'm telling the truth
Just say you dunno who did it
You don't know who done it, just say it weren't you man
But I do know who done it, what you talking about? I'ma tell the truth
I ain't lying, lie innit
What am I gonna lie for? I ain't got nothing to hide
It all started off normal, no one was on a hype
But Skepta had a tool, and all I had was a knife
I said, "I'm gonna tell the truth," but they all said I should lie
But I thought, "Why the hell should I flippin' lie for? I got nothing to hide"
We was all getting ready, yeah, I could feel it was gonna kick off
My patience was drawing thin already as Skepta took his coat off
I think that's when it all started, you know, the hype of Skepta's head
And plus, 'cause he had the tool in his hand, nothing needed to be said
All I heard was bang! And I swear I heard something smashed
So I dropped the knife on the floor, and I went to help Skepta 'cause I was baffed
But then when I got there, he was lying on the floor
And the whole place was a mess
There was a little bit of blood, but I expected more
We all started arguing, as if that was gonna help the case
I was gonna call the ambulance, but I didn't want it to escalate
Yeah, I know it sounds a bit dumb, I really should have picked up the phone
But I knew that any minute now we was expecting you home
Jamie
Yes, mum?
Is Junior alright?
Yeah, he's alright, man
Put your brother on the phone for me, please, let me speak to him
Nah, he's alright, man, he's alright, it's just a little cut
Have you called the police?
What are we calling the police for?
When I said Skepta had a tool, I didn't mean a gun, I meant a hammer
He was assembling your birthday present
He got you a wardrobe, I got you a camera
Then Julie came home from IKEA, 'cause she went to get you a vase
And the reason I had a knife is 'cause I was cutting your cake in half
Then Skepta started getting all hyper, kept on mucking about with the tools
Then the hammer slipped from his hand
And smashed the vase and scratched up your walls
That's when I heard the bang, I dropped the knife and went to go check
'Cause your surprise birthday party was just turning into a wreck
But don't worry, it was nothing major, Julie was a bit upset
And Skepta cut his finger, and the front room was a mess
That's when we started arguing, about who was in the wrong
But don't worry, I'll buy you a new vase, anyway happy birthday mum
Jason get me the dustpan, messy, man
Look at the mess, man, come, ah, man
See that's what you have to do, man
I told you what to do, man, just tell the truth, man
Yeah, I know, I know, I know
See now you're gonna laugh, look at you laughing, man, I see
Flippin' hell, can we tidy up, let's tidy all this up before dad comes back
'Cause I ain't really into dad's shouting, you get me? Come
Yeah, come then, come, come, come
Next time let's tell the truth innit, no lie

Writer(s): Jme.